Where are you baby? Part II

For weeks when we have been asked the question, "So, have you heard anything yet?" we've been saying, "No... We told them we wouldn't be free until June 1st, so we won't hear anything till then." Of course all this time we had been hoping that June 1st would roll around and we would get the good news very soon: "Great! She's all ready. Come and get her!"

Now June 1st has come and gone and we do have some news, but not the news we had hoped to hear.

Earlier this week, we sent an email to the Magistrate to let them know that we would be finished with our most pressing work responsibilities as of Monday June 5th and available to receive the baby from then on. The polite and prompt reply came back the next day via our translator. "Please tell them we know they are eager but we haven't yet found a baby for them. We are continuing to search and hope it will be soon."

Bummer!

The hardest thing for me about the way adoption happens (at least here in the Czech Republic) is the lack of concrete information and a sense of timing (i.e. "Are we talking next week or six months from now?" "Hmm.... No idea."). I battle feelings of powerlessness and being at the whim of bureaucrats I can't even speak with directly about something so deeply important to us. It's not that I think it won't happen. I know it will (see note on platitudes below) but it is simply hard having so much uncertainty.

For example, I have no idea when my last day of work will be. That means any lesson with a particular group (whom I see just once a week) could be the last one, so it is hard to know how and when to say goodbye. (I have already talked to my school and will stop working once we get "the call.")

Last night, Matt was gracious enough to help me do something constructive with these frustrated feelings by moving around our furniture configuration in our bedroom in order to put the crib where we want it. We decided we might as well get it ready now because it is something concrete we can do to be more prepared and it will also help us get used to the new arrangement so that there won't be too many changes all at once.

A FINAL NOTE ON PLATITUDES
Thank you to everyone for praying and listening and caring. If you have ever been in a frustrating time and shared about your feelings with other Christians, you may be able to relate to the feeling of just wanting to be heard and affirmed. So, with genuine gratitude for the kind-hearted intentions behind this common Christian practice, I give all our dear friends and family permission *not to* respond to my current feelings with statements such as, "God is in control" and "Everything will come together in God's perfect timing." :-)

Some potentially more helpful responses would be something like:

"I can imagine it must be really hard to wait."
"How can we be praying for her and for you right now?"
"What are you looking forward to about being a new mom/dad?"
"What will you miss about your life before parenting?"

P.S. Of course, I have found in the past that every time I have posted something about the adoption up on this blog, we seem to receive new information that the exact opposite scenario of what I just reported has now become the likely new scenario. So maybe when I hit that magic little "Publish Post" button here in a second, I will hear my phone ring... :-)